Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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