Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
