All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
