plz talk dirty to me
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
