A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
