I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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