i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Randomize
