it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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