This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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