Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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