And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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