Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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