Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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