Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Who wears a wallet chain?!
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
