my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
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