The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize