Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
