We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
