Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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