Christians are straight up FREAKS
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
