have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
