Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
My vagina is officially offended.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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