Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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