I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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