Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
