I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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