If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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