if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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