Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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