i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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