fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
