Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
