my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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