ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
