I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
