Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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