I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
