Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
