I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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