4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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