Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
