You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
