Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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