just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize
