i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
