on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize