That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
