Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize