i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
