just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Randomize
