this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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